Kandido lefthis Dr Martins on the central square of kunming. he was used to wear them for the last 7 years. everywhere. hot or cold. on snow paths or desert sand. he bought a cheap chinese shoes to go tracking in tibet... but tibet is not that near!
so many things had happens. so many coincidences rose in him new ideas. no words could express the complexity of his life. no words can describe even the small events that were happening to him. everything is too full and the words are not bowls big enought to contain it.
life is so amazing that he would need a day to write what happen in the day before.. but in this way he would miss living another amazing day. and a short description of episode would be like a lie. kandido doesn't want to lie. so he will stop writing.
no more deceiving words, no more deceiving stories.
just living.
"The words are empty. words of gods and God and ofNo-God. (Emptiness, Silence)words from Mind, only praise (silence). The signs are apparent. garuda have flown,the greatest sinner walks a fragrant garden in the western paradise, and the student has awakened.Love is a condition of the Pure Land.There is only this: there is no not this."
snowing day. kandido enter in the seoul museum of art to find a warm place where to rest. magritte is there. he missed his exhibition in italy, then in los angels, but now he's there. and he's a new magritte. a magritte seon master, that question about identity, about emptyness of language, emptyness of mind concept...
korean seon (zen) doesn't believe in words (kandido saw a lecture hall in a temple that was called moo sol jon: no word hall!!!) but nether less they write poetry to stimulate thinking not to pass a truth...
"as things by nature are originally silent, they do not say "i am blue" or " i am yellow." people are the only ones who distinguish in their own minds, declaring noisily, "this is good", "this is bad." if your mind is the same as clouds or water, even as you collide with objects of desire, no matter what happens in your life, you remain free. when people's minds are not forced to name and distinguish things, nothing good or bad arises"
"Who am i?" "Who am i?""Who am i?""Who am i?""Who am i?""Who am i?""Who am i?""Who am i?""Who am i?""Who am i?""Who am i?""Who am i?""Who am i?""Who am i?""Who am i?""Who am i?""Who am i?""Who am i?""Who am i?""Who am i?""Who am i?""Who am i?""Who am i?""Who am i?""Who am i?""Who am i?""Who am i?""Who am i?""Who am i?""Who am i?""Who am i?""Who am i?""Who am i?""Who am i?""Who am i?""Who am i?""Who am i?""Who am i?""Who am i?""Who am i?""Who am i?""Who am i?""Who am i?""Who am i?""Who am i?""Who am i?""Who am i?""Who am i?""Who am i?""Who am i?""Who am i?""Who am i?""Who am i?""Who am i?""Who am i?""Who am i?""Who am i?""Who am i?""Who am i?""Who am i?""Who am i?""Who am i?""Who am i?""Who am i?""Who am i?""Who am i?""Who am i?""Who am i?""Who am i?""Who am i?""Who am i?""Who am i?""Who am i?""Who am i?""Who am i?""Who am i?""Who am i?""Who am i?""Who am i?""Who am i?""Who am i?""Who am i?""Who am i?""Who am i?""Who am i?""Who am i?""Who am i?""Who am i?""Who am i?""Who am i?""Who am i?""Who am i?""Who am i?""Who am i?""Who am i?""Who am i?""Who am i?""Who am i?""Who am i?""Who am i?""Who am i?""Who am i?""Who am i?""Who am i?""Who am i?""Who am i?""Who am i?""Who am i?"
seon buddhist methods to get the real self fundation. questioning , questioning, questioning.
The day after kandido wake up with a big head ache.
the officer takes the paper kandido filled in: "are you kandido, aren't you?" "yes" kandido replies carefully. tons of border problems made him careful and respectful. "you wrote researcher as profession. what's your research field?" "mmmh. good question. i am just a researcher. if i would write curious it would not sound as good. wouldn't it?" "no. i supposed not" the officer smiled. the noise of the stamp seals kandido entering in Korea!
kandido was always amazed by the cure of details, by the attention the Japaneses put in objects, gardens, miniature toys... things Shinto religion says that things have a soul: trees, stones, mountains... and why not a mobile phone? why not a laptop? every lapotop or mobile phone is enriched by pendants, little toys, little jewels, like their temples, like their Buddhas, like their gardens... why not? is there a spirituality even in electronics stuff??
that's japan for kandido: an electronic Buddha.where tradition, new and old spirituality are mixed with the newest technology and lifestyle!
BlessedChild and Erynis are crashed down on the table. an untouched slice of chocolate cake is still waiting on the table. hopeless now! it's 8 in the morning in Osaka. kandido spent all night long dancing with them. Japan electro sound! the waiter, a composed mannered man on his forty, is keeping on serving coffees to kandido. he looks at the two girls, then he looks at him, says something smiling and then he pours another cup of coffee! kandido replies to him in italian "si, sono molto stanche! le belle addormentate!". the man goes back to his duty. he takes one by one all the packets on the counter. he analyses each with severity. he counts them and puts them back. he does his job with the same attention of a controller of a nuclear fusion engine. behind them, on a another table there are two girls with their trolley with all the makeups. they are getting ready for home. the party is over for them too. time to get normal again! on another table a couple of worker is studying some papers on the table. they are drinking few coffees. Erynis mumbles something keeping hold his napkin. she can use it in her dream. very so often someone snores. but we are the gaijing, the japanese accept us for what we are: weird! the chief waiter is still counting his packets. a woman puts her red lipstick. and outside the window life starts pulsing again. the chief waiter call a young waiter and shows her a packet. she takes the packets and nods with enthusiasm. now, they both nod with enthusiasm. then a customer goes out and they are immediately back in their roles: "arigato gosaimasta" they say in chorus.
kandido was dancing madly with Blessed. they were possessed by the music: moving like puppets controlled by the dj strings. electric atomic powered overwhelming robot puppets! (is this japan?) in the middle of the babel a girls caught kandido's eyes. she was out of place. her friend here hugging her tenderly, pushing her to enter the party. but kandido could read on her face the sadness ganji. the whole body was talking about love problem. he could even imagine her friend telling her "come on! the world is full of men... he was just a bastard... " and head down. she was in dancing like crazy and one second after jumping with the middle finger raised towards the crowd. "fuck the world!". "yes baby, fuck the world!" kandido started jumping doing the same gesture. the she took a camera and shot a picture of the people dancing. kandido is just in a corner. she waited the moment there is nobody between them and shot again. and she disappeared. "she has stolen my image!" kandido fell asleep on the stair. Blessed fell aslepp on him. a human pile. at 7 they went out. the sun was already high in the sky. Erynis rised his eyes and saw the coke ads "Live with a coke style!" they laughed sincerely. the town echoed frankly. their feet were still dancing making a longer road. that's the problem when your feet are dancing and your mind is off! kandido wanted a coffee and a croissant! the shape of the croissant has the same elliptical structure of his italian DNA!
Erynis toilet door: "when you face two road take the one you can dance!". when you are sitted on the toilet and you read that, and you think that also niezctche, and disonisus and buddha said the same thing ... but it is not what you say but the condition, the place. toilet could be a good place for enleightment! good job Erynis!
an old woman in the train makes origami. her finger are very fast. in few minutes she produce a beautiful dragonfly origami that gives as a present to the every kids on the trains. she distributes colorful sheets of paper to the mothers and teaches them how to do it. the children play happily.. arigato arigato gosaimas!
"funny and interesting are translated by the same word in Japanese!" the BlessedChild says to kandido. "i must feel like a japanese!! for me everything interesting and surprising is funny! it makes me happy" "that's fahnny!" smiles the BlessedChild
the train controller bows when enter the wagon. and he bows when he goes out. he doest it with respect and attention for his role. like the bus driver that thanks every person that goes out of his bus. when kandido missed his stop the driver says sorry like if it was his fault!
everything in japan is clean, tidy, in order. like the zen stone gardens. Japaneses keeps the nature under control: bonsai trees, perfect gardens. kandido don't understand, he likes the chaos in nature, the winding shapes. when he sees the zen stone garden he is surprised. why fighting everyday against wind, rain for hundreds years for making such a perfect structure. "is it that zen?" he wonders. "how many men everyday have raked that sand? like a mandala made with dust!"
japanese people suicide during the weekend so they don't have to interrupt their job. if they want to jump under a train, they choose a line that doesn't cost much so their family doesn't have to pay much for their death. the sense or respect for the other is present even before abandon life. "aren't they angry with the rest of the world, with their chief, with their families?"
the cure for details is everywhere. the food is not only delicious but also beautiful served. women take so much cure of themselves: not only the aspect but also the way to walk or to sit or smile. in asia they are unique. nor korea nor china is so maniacal in the cure of details and of little things and objects. their zen is so too: based on the form. their calligraphy and their martial arts too. sophisticated is the adjective that kandido finds describe better their attitude. but sophisticate has a double meaning not only affected or elaborate but also adulterated. kandido can't judge which is which in japan.
M rises his eyes. he mixes some different kinds of blue in a tiny plastic pot that he sticks on the table with some vaseline. he dips the needle in the ink and continues his drawing. the man under his hands breathes slowly: another dragon. another yakuza. M. never asks his customers their job but you can recognize a yakuza easily: usually they comes on luxurious cars, dressed in Armani outfit. sometimes in sports outfit but with Gucci shoes. 90 % of his customers belongs to yakuza. they ask usually for a total body tattoo. Dragons, samurai , demons... sometimes flower of carps... but generally they prefer scary subjects. that why he was surprised when K asked him a total body tattoo with a Buddha. K was a typical yakuza: BMW car, Armani outfit and expensive Italian shoes. "A Tibetan Buddha. I want him smiling. i Don't care about the rest. you can choose what you prefer, he can be surrounded by Bodhisattva's or my colorful rays or clouds..." "OK i can do that. give me some time to study the subject..." "i don't have much time..." "you know, a whole body tattoo can take one or two years... moreover tattoos are living art object, they are never completed... you can add details, add new parts... tattooing last a whole life..." K grinned: "are you proposing me to marry you?" M.smiled "not properly... and divorce exists! OK in one year i can complete the drawing, the shadowing and the coloring... but then you cab add the lights later... it's up to you... or maybe you can stop after the drawing because of the pain." K grinned again: "it's not some needle scratching on my skin what i call pain..." K seated, took a cigarette from his silver cigarette case and started smoking. "Ok. let's do it. don't expect chocolate for San valentine..." They shook the hands and thanking M. slightly bowed.
Th day after M. went to the used book shop and bought a dozen book on Tibetan Buddha paintings. Keiko was surprised to see his father studying all that religious images..."are you getting Buddhists?" she asked him smiling.. everyday M. was drawing quick lines on a big paper sheet with a red pencil. he started sketching the body then the drapery. usually when he thinks he keeps on drawing: the hands move on their own. the pencil stress the lines automatically, it makes the shapes move fluids. and the movements help him thinking like if there was a relationship between the movements of the energy in his brain and the running of the pencil on the paper. after two weeks on the drawing appeared some Prussian blue lines. they mean that the drawing is completed. that that part will be reproduced on the skin. only the face was till undone.
he drew the face many times but he couldn't unveil the secret of Buddha's smile. The eyes have a sort of mild, mellow sadness and the mouth: a shadow of smile. in other paintings, the eyes were happy and the mouth serious, but at the end the expression was the same. "time to start" the voice at the phone was unconditional. "I've told you i don't have time. i came next Tuesday around 4 pm" K's body was not muscly. his skin was tender and the muscle soft. "this makes the work quicker" thought M. M started to draw the Buddha sited on many elegant cushions, holding a rosary of skulls in his hands. he picked up that details from a painting of an esoteric Buddhist sect of Tibet. he thought that it could be suited for a yakuza. "why a skull rosary?" K. wondered using his harsh tone. "no real reason. i just saw on a paintings and i took it!" "you should study what you draw. you told me that you were studyng these paintings aren't you? what the fuck does it mean that damn rosary?" M. bowed his head. "you know" K. continued some colleagues of mine believe that having a dragon or a demon on their skin give than a sort of magical power. sometimes they said they feel like they are possessed by the energy of their tattoo. possessed by demon... and their work is easy... no fear... no pity... a draw on the skin is like an idea that becomes flesh. a soul that gets a body. how can you dare to draw something so important without knowing the reason???"
The day after M. took the train to Koyasan. in Koyasan there is the greatest sect of esoteric Buddhist in japan. he slept in a monastery (the only accommodation you can find there) during the day he was wandering in temples studying all the Buddha images. in front of every painting there was a sign saying "refrain yourself from taking picture or sketching". so he drew the images on his mind. that night he was the only guest in the monastery. the monk explained to him that during that period they don't have many visitors... but during the plum blossom or the read leaves the monastery was crowded. " if you want you can participate to the morning prayer. tomorrow our sensei will be present. he's just gotten back from Italy..." "i am not really Buddhist..." "it doesn't matter. it starts at 6" after the prayer the monk invited M to have a tea with the sensei. the sensei was an old man wearing a big smile and bigger glasses. "what do you think of Mussolini" he asked. "i think he could be consider a criminal... an evil person..." the old man smiled. "in Italy they think the same. when i asked to visit and pray on his tomb i shocked everybody!!! he was just a man and he has his karma." "his karma..." repeated thoughtful M. "maybe in that is the secret of Buddha smile. in his compassion for man condition... for their karma to bear"
back home M. started to study Buddhist religions and symbology. he decide to draw one hand of the Buddha closing the thumb and the index representing the wheel of karma. one day K. arrived with a round scar on his shoulder. K. saw M starring at it. he smiled " he didn't aim well: the heart is 20cm below!" K> Draw a lotus flower bud on top of it. "Lotus flowers" he explained to K." comes from the dirty mud at the bottom of the pond, but when they bloom they aren't stained and their white is reflecting the sun light." after few month the drawing was nearly finished. Buddha had his rosary of Indian nutmeg. he was surrounded by lotus flower coming from a muddy lake and the Buddha saw sited on a big lotus flower too. the moment arrived. the face. and he drew the best face he had ever made. in the meantime K become more than a customer: sometimes he brought some presents for hi daughters: Ruy and keiko. And sometimes he taught them some origami. that day M Shaved his head. "you luck like a bonzo not as a cool tattoo artist". his wife had fun of him.
seeing hi shaved head bent preparing the ink K noticed all the scars he had on his head. he thought "my god, he is full of scars. and the body is covered by tattoos... maybe this guy was a bad guy when he was young... maybe he belonged to a band... and that scar in the middle of the front...exactly where it supposed to be the third eye... it looks like a ganji character... it means something... i don't remember... god know what does mean!" when M. raised his head he said in his harsh mode "come on bonzo. finish your job!" and he smiled . just a little smile with the corner of the lips. after that everything was easier: the shadowing was fast and the colouring was proceeding very quickly. one day Ryu playing on the studio spilled some red ink on uncle K's Buddha sketch. The kid got worried but the ink propagate fast. It covered the chest and started to flow down the legs. Ryu took the stained Buddha and hided.
Uncle K never came again to bring them presents or teaching how to make turtle origami. from that day M. draw his best tattoo for yakuza people. for him was like drawing beautiful mandala with sand. and he put all his love in doing it!
One day kandido arrived asking for a tattoo and M told him that people is not able to see sign anymore. "too much TV" he smiled smoking a cigarette. Outside the olive tree M planted was growing up gently.
Next to the salarymen society there is a hidden one. people who doesn't watch tv, who behave differently. new psy-trance hippies, tattooed people. artists. they are different from the underworld people of the rest of the world: they are very kind and with a great sense of humor. masa, miyazo, kazoo... kandido met many of them. kandido's mind is still bugging about the name of the masa bar: "Y's bar". like a japanese koan (Zen question meant to trigger off a Zen awakening)it could have different meaning... wise's bar, why's bar...
once kandido was playing with Shin, touching each other with karate movements and after say sorry in typical japaenese attitude: "sumimasen!" "you should go to vist Nepal: it's great. the pothala: impressive." shin starts "you know, man? when i was there a stayed two hours sitted on a bech admiring the mountains around" kandido thinks that shin is atypical japanese. he saw many time japanese starring at blossom trees, or mountain. shin continues: "of course i smoked some pot before!" "what?" kandido can't belive that. " i keep on seeing people sitted in front od flower, cherry blossom tree. sitting for hours! they don not smoke anything!!!" "have you checked if they had in their bag some sake bottle?"
Tokyo zombies: teenagers get dressed weirdly on Sunday to show off their diversity... but they all do it at the same way!!! women in japan looks like dolls. they celebrate also a girl day. every family has some old dolls and they make a party for them. girls are beautiful and they take great care of themself. but it is strange to see walking weirdly on this high heels with cowboy bent legs. they look precious little kids.
praying for a girlfriend: not easy finding a woman in japan. men seem more interested in their porno comics than in girls!
building a robot society: you should start from the early years. school 16 hour a day. many rules. conformity. everybody should look the same: uniforms. study everything by heart to pass multiple choice tests. if you talk with them they reply the school prepared answer. "what's your name... pleased to meet you." if you ask something different. silence. respect the others (if you are ill wear your paper mask!), everybody in queue. always thanks (you hear "arigato gosaimas" at least 200 times a day! ), if you can't do something, or something is wrong excuse youyrself even if it's not your fault.and remeber: never say no! celebrate the holidays: doing shopping. shopping, shopping! people warks 6 days a week. 12-14 hours per day. then they go to drink with the collegues. they wake up early. drink energetic drink and back to work. for the holidays is the same. crazy rythms.. even for the shopping. everybody should takes picture of the changing season, flower blossom, red leaves fallings etc everybody should control the other. you will be always under control: people is everywhere!
incense smoke. volutes rise slowly from the brazier.
candle lights and reassuring darkness.
the monks are chanting ancient mantras. a bells sing. then a metallic tinkling like lids and saucepans.
then the noise of crackling fire from the next room where a old monk was meditating.
kandido remembers his fireplace in liguria in the cold winter mornings, when the sky is clear. the galipot perfume he smelled in the mystic forest in Mendocino.
he stats swinging his head rhythmically. he shuts his eyes, letting the noises cradle him.
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